Iz John McCain a Sloe Lerner? *

Together Again

‘Murika’s Sweethearts

Dr. Frankenstein and His Monster

U.S. Senator John McCain (L) and former Alaska governor and vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin acknowledge the crowd during a campaign rally for McCain at the Pima County Fairgrounds in Tucson, Arizona, March 26, 2010. REUTERS/Joshua Lott
Credit: Reuters/Joshua Lott

Senator McCain, in case you forgot (which would not be surprising given the advanced stage of Alzheimers you have been battling since that resounding smackdown you got last November), things didn’t go so well for you the last time you stood next to this  retard, grifter, biker granny, eejit  (*sigh*)  person.

It looks like you two have made some sort of kinky, sado-masochistic, political suicide pact with the devil.  You need Palin’s endorsement to get the fringy Teabagger votes, and she needs you for… hmm… I don’t really know what she needs you for anymore.  Same for Cindy.

Funny how that deal worked out for you.  That shrew you plucked fresh off the Alaskan tundra now has to swoop in and save your wrinkled old ass.  Ironic.  The fact that you must both hate each other with a flaming intensity unmatched in recent political history, and are only going through the motions dictated by the cynicism and absolute drive to win that is demanded by desperate conservatives today actually has entertainment value for some people (me!).

So Palin agrees to come and give a stump screech for you, in perfectly appropriate campaign gear: dominatrix-style tight leather jacket complete with tit-zippers (this is the perfect metaphor for your relationship, BTW–there’s no doubt who’s in charge here), and you stand there gamely, trying to absorb the fact that not only has she completely upstaged you, she is practically mocking you to your face.  Well not actually to your face; her back is to you.  This positioning of her body directly in front of yours, separating you from the audience, completely obliterates your old wrinkly self from the view of the crowd and the camera.  But that’s OK–the crowd is here to see her anyway!  And poor Cindy—she looks constipated and has lasers shooting out of her eyes each time she looks in Palin’s direction.

So good luck with your re-election.  Isn’t insanity described as doing something the same way and yet hoping for a different result?                Just saying.

 [P.S.—Senator McCain, I know this product I am about to endorse is all new-fangled and such, like the Intertubes, but has anyone ever told you about Crest White Strips?… Didn’t think so.]

GO Hayworth!!  (Never thought I’d say that.)

* No.  He is just “differently-abled.”  In the head.